It has happened to a lot of us- a seemingly decent, regular communication with someone via the Internet cut off suddenly, without warning. This phenomenon, known as ghosting, is the dating term that refers to abrupt ceasing of contact with someone without giving that person any warning or explanation for doing so. Even if the person being ghosted tries to re-initiate contact, they are met with silence.

Ghosting rose to popularity with the surge of online dating. It is seen as an easy way out of a relationship; rather than confront problems, one can simply shut down and ignore their partner.

We at The Tower urge students to not ghost. It may seem like a silly request, but we mean it.
Ghosting has become increasingly normalized, especially for high schoolers, and we fear the issues that arise from this.

Ghosting psychologically impacts those being ghosted. Studies have found that ghosting may lead to internalized feelings of self-criticism and self-doubt, which then in turn hinder future abilities to trust. As said by Psychology Today, “one of the most insidious aspects of ghosting is that it doesn’t just cause you to question the validity of the relationship you had, it causes you to question yourself. Why didn’t I see this coming? How could I have been such a poor judge of character? What did I do to cause this?”

We recognize the discomfort of ending a relationship. That is natural and normal. However, communication is the foundation of a relationship and the foundation of society. It allows people to share feelings, opinions, hopes, fears and more. Good relationships cannot be sustained without good communication. Developing good communication skills at a young age is vital for adult life.

It is fine to no longer want to be in a relationship or a friendship with someone. All The Tower is encouraging is that you properly end the relationship in a way that is healthy for both parties. Not only is this the respectful thing to do, it is also simply the morally responsible thing to do.